I think in the times we feel stuck, we become detached from the world surrounding us. So we trudge through the mud during the week and days will merge into one another until it’s the weekend and you can just finally get some rest. Right now, I feel as if I‘ve been placed in a pool that is 8 feet deep and I am in wet cement to my knees and it is drying by the second but the walls are just too high. I don’t think that I have the strength to jump. I have people telling me to wait until the cement has done its job but it will take time and eventually someone will help to break me out of it. If I try before I receive the help of another, I will break a leg or two in the process and that’s not an option - so here I am. I am stuck and I don’t want to be here anymore but this is the result of the actions that have led me to where I am in life. I was originally told this was a river of gold that would help me to further myself in life and get a good step in the right direction for my stupid fucking future but now I’m just stuck.
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February 2020
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